As I sit here at 4 a.m. following the lame-ass job leads that I have from Monster and Careerbuilder, I sit here and wonder...
"How did the greats get employed?"
I mean, a lot of highly successful and/or famous people never got a college degree so why, pray tell, did I have to spend 4 years in boarding school and 4 years in college just to end up living at my parents house, living off of frosted mini-wheats, and wondering where the hell all that Valium went from when I had my wisdom teeth pulled back in '05??? (No seriously...Dad...if you're reading this...where did Mom stash the goods??)
Then it hit me.
I am going to be the next Lil' Jon.
Think about it! It's perfect. I mean sure, I may have to work on getting dreads and all. I guess a grill will need to happen too but hey, I still have my old rainbow retainer?? Headgear?
I mean seriously? How hard is it to sit in a studio all day and yell out three measly words? And with my college degree I really think I could up the ante so to speak.
Instead of saying "YEAAAAHHHHH," "OKKKKAAAYYYYY," and "WHAAAATTTTTT," I can replace them with degree appropriate words such as"THEEERRREEEEEFOREEEE" or even "IPPPPSOOOOO FACTTTOOOO."
Did I mention I speak French? I mean, I really just think I bring a whole new element to the table that music producers just haven't even seen before.
I guess there's also the whole drug issue. I suppose I could sniff some glue in order to soak up the true aura of the original Lil' Jon. His drinking issues? Ha, gotcha covered.
The best part about this idea? I already got family in the business. With my brother's new plans to shoot a music video for his Chicago pop-sensation song "Butt-sex," I know I can figure something out.
Despite the fact, that his YouTube video is grouped in the category next to Samwell's highly homosexual "What What in the Butt" Video, he nevertheless received a whopping 200 views in the last 24 hours. Impressive.
CHECK IT OUT!
I may have to subject myself to some degrading work in his shoot but hey, its all for the music baby.
It's Lindsay, bitch!
Wow Lindsay i think you bring up some very interesting points about our society today and how people idolize some people with no talents. Many figures that people view as celebrity are only famous for saying things such as "YEA" or " Get Krunk". Or someone like Paris Hilton who is only famous for well, being famous. It makes me question society and why the glamorize certain things that are really not that special. However, the A$$ Goblin is an exception because he is incredibly talented and not to mention incredibly charming and handsome. If all celebrities were more like him the world would be a better place. Thank you for listening
ReplyDeleteSincerely,
D.J. Damrow